Boy's Night
by mUmaRhz
Summary: Typical boy's night is as usual last minute. "You never ever mention that your going to have a boys night. You didn't build the bridge and your now in the sea drowning. No you're under the sea. You've sunken and died" Currently a one-shot and M for language. Please read A/N for background on story. Includes Zeke, Uriah, Will, Peter, Eric, Amar and George.


**Authors Note: PLEASE IMPORTANT TO READ.**

 **Hii! Im not dead lol, just haven't had the inspiration yet to complete** ** _Life of the Army_** **, of which I had taken down because I wasn't happy with it. None the less I will get back to it. PROMISE! Anyway, I am writing this story for some reason the idea keep bugging me. So hopefully this goes alright.**

 **Firstly, PLEASE WATCH THIS VIDEO FIRST to get an idea on where I am going with this one-shot. I can't add the link since it's a video from Facebook. For those from NZ if you've seen it then you'll understand, if not then welcome to some Kiwi humour. This story was inspired by the video.**

 **So go on to Facebook and follow the steps:**

1) Type in and search for **"SnP Show, Auckland New Zealand** " OR type in and remove the brackets (www).(facebook).com(/)(TheSnPShow?fref=ts)

Hopefully you see a photo of two brown guys wearing white t-shirts and glasses. Unless they've changed their picture then PM me

2) Scroll down and look for video posted on **26 April (04) 2015 at 8:00pm**

3) It should be the video based on the summary on **"How to get permission to go out with the boys"** Lol, basically the video is about every single guy asking permission from their girlfriend/wife/partner to go out with his friends and the lengths he goes to, to get permission.

 **They have other videos so feel free to watch them and laugh. Ive decided to do two different stories using the same overall plot but different circumstances. So this story is a Divergent angle and not too sure on the other…currently deciding between a Harry Potter one or a Naruto one.**

 **But this is a Divergent One-shot (probably) at this point based off this video. I've chosen to start with Divergent Trilogy series, as that is the current reading phase that I am in. I'm new, as I've only seen the movies not the read the books (which is a first), to this area so please bear with me!**

 **All Normal Disclaimers Apply**

 **Not betaed. If someone wants to then please let me know.**

 **Its AU though and in some cases might be OOC. This is from Tobias' POV. I'm a girl soo I'm only thinking of what might happen if it was in a boys POV lol. I think it's more hilarious.**

 **mumarhz**

* * *

 ** _Boy's night_**

After logging out of my computer from my office, I lean back in my chair, close my eyes and let out a tired sigh, as the day comes to an end. Three months ago I finally accepted the Leadership role. Parts of my duties was improving "diplomatic relations" between Dauntless and Amity, Abnegation and the Factionless which was to say the least totally _fun_ – hear how utterly enthused that was said – amongst completing other normal leadership duties here at Dauntless. I guess some reprieve is the fact that Eric is a still ticked that we share the same title, same office floor and all but who gives a shit. Life in Chicago was slowly but surely changing. For the better? Well only time will tell I guess.

Presently, all the factions were allowed to freely interact with each other as it built, or at least that was the aim, understanding, acceptance and harmony while decreasing ignorance and conflict. Some things that hasn't and won't change is the aptitude tests, is the faction you choose to be in on Choosing Day, and the various initiation processes.

Lately things in life had been terribly busy, and I haven't had time to myself, time to just _be_ with Tris, or time to hang out with the guys. With stepping up and finally accepting the Leadership role after one of the elder Dauntless leaders decided to retire, to Tris reminding me about the date night that we had set aside weeks ago, to preparing to receive new initiates in three months and incorporating new changes to the initiation process, to having Tris hack my computer and change my desktop background into a reminder for our date, to Eric hounding my ass on some security detail in the Factionless sector, to Tris literally jumping me every time she gets a chance so as to _remind you_ she says about date night, though _smirk_ I'm not complaining as I replay that little interlude in the closet down the hall that happened six hours ago in my head, to Zeke being his loud annoying self and somehow dragging me into things, to Tris screaming at me this morning about date night before I walk out the door, to getting little to no sleep…let's just say it's been a long month..

Because of our, well okay more like my busy schedule, there have been days where I would go from seeing Tris once or four times a day, to once every three to five, sometimes even six, days. When I am stationed in Dauntless she takes every opportunity to make up for the time I've been away, and sad to say I haven't been doing much in showing my appreciation. Other than a kiss hello or goodbye. A call here or there when I'm in another faction. A small but heartfelt gift. Nonetheless, in the past four months I've been a shitty boyfriend whose been reaping all the benefits of having an awesome woman.

That's why I need to make it up to her tonight. But really all I want to do is have a break. Doing nothing but preferably just some down time with a nice cold beer, or seven…a loud **_slam_** resounded in my office shocking me. Adrenalin kicking in, I snapped my eyes open and my gun from on top of my desk and pointed at the mother fucker who had chosen to enter my office in such a way. Standing with his hand up in the air and eyes wide was for all intents and purposes my best friend Zeke.

Speak of the devil and shit shall appear.

"Woah dude it's just me!"

"Why'd you barge in here like that for?" I snarl still pointing my gun at him.

"Could you at least put the gun down? My buddy, pal, chum, maaate…" Zeke squeaked

I continued to glare, as my adrenalin slowly eased, and leisurely lowered my arm and the gun, sighing again more loudly.

"What do you want Zeke?"

"What no hello, how are you my friend? No? Just me? Okay then Im doing well, no great actually since you asked so kindly Four, and since you are here, I'll let you bask in my presence a little longer." He says while doing some flexing poses "I, yes I, am soo freaking intelligent –"

"The point Zeke –"

" – Okay, okay. So a few of us macho guys, macho men…well I'm a man and your all little guys with little" winking an eye and wiggle a pinkie "I have come up with an amazing idea. Drum roooll. Okay seriously stop with the glare, and for all that is Holy put. The. Gun. DOOOWN. Four you're hurting my feelings!"

"And you're testing my patience!"

"Well Tris certainly isn't doing her job well and you'd think with all the sex you two have been having lately while you've been home, you'd think you'd be calm but noo –"

"WHAT THE HELL DO YOU WANT?!"

"Okaaaaay man, tough crowd. Well what I was going to say, waaas you son of a bitch you messed up my entire presentation, was that we should have a boys night out – Dauntless style. No girls, just a few of us guys, some drinks and go get fucked! Well not literally as I'm fully limited to and wanted by women thanks and Shauna loves my bits sooo. Yeah that is my epic plan!"

As much as I wouldn't like to admit it, having a night out with just the guys was appealing right now. But I knew, I _knew_ that I couldn't. Tris had been looking forward to having a date night with just us two all month and I couldn't be that selfish to her and go fulfill my selfish but highly appealing wants. I had to do this for her. Shaking my head I looked at Zeke.

"I can't man, its date night"

"You scheduled, _scheduled time_ for Tris?"

Feeling my face and ears grow hot I growl "Well it's not like have had the time. Ive been so busy, I had to save a date and work everything around this date so that I can spend time with her." I look at Zeke who is failing to hide his amusement. "You try doing my job dipshit and see if you have time for Shauna. I barely have time to eat or take a bloody shower before I'm off doing something."

"No wonder Tris has been jumping you whenever she wants" Zeke snickered loudly "You poor bastard. But seriously, this has been the first time since all of us guys have been in Dauntless at the same time. We need to do something! What time are you taking her out and what are doing?"

My face flushes again, and I cringe as I mumble my answer.

"What?" Zeke asked in a confused voice leaning closer to me over the other side of my desk

"….she wants to go see that simulation/video/thing called the '13 going on 30' or some shit."

Silence engulfs the room with Zeke blinks slowly, while I try to maintain a stoic face. Six months ago, a group of people in the Factionless had found some merchandise that had been a part of Chicago prior to the "end of the world" or the faction system. It is believed that they were called moo-vees or something and have since then become an activity that all factions are allowed to take part in together.

Zeke's mind must have made a connection to what I had said for he says to me in a slow but blank voice "Your telling me…that you're going to go watch a chick flick? That you, the almighty prodigal Four, one of the most feared leaders of Dauntless is going to watch a _chick flick for a date_?"

I nod.

Zeke loses his shit. Bursting out in laughter, he falls to the ground, howling away. I cringe and becoming flustered I yell "Well Tris wants to go see what it is! Dammit, it's not like I actually want to go watch it! Ive read what it's about! But fuck, I can't back out of it now!"

"Bahahahahahahahahahahaha. Im gonna pee. Im gonna pee!"

I push out of my chair, letting it fly backwards, and storm in front of Zeke lifting my leg I kick him in the stomach "Shut up asshole, before I shoot another hole in you!"

"I cant breathe! I cant breathe! Hahahahahahahaha"

I tiredly wipe my face and groan aloud as I drag myself way back into my chair.

While Zeke laughs at my expense on the floor, I hang my head in my hands. I love Tris, of course I do. Would do anything for her. But I really do not want to go watch this, as Zeke said, _chick flick_. Ugh, even the name send shudders down my spine. _'13 going on 30'_. Shudder. Flip, this is what happens when you don't be a good boyfriend and set time for your significant other. What am I going to do I whine in my head, cause fuck Im not giving Zeke even more ammunition to laugh at my expense.

"What the hell is going on?" an annoyed voice sounds in the room cutting off my thoughts. I stiffen and slowly raise a glare at Zeke who's still freaking chuckling on the floor. That asshat better not say a word –

"Chick flick! Bahahahahaa! 13 going on 30! Ahahahaha!"

I slouch right down in my chair a groan as Eric the fucker who had "perfect timing" arches an eyebrow, slowly blinks, and then bends over chuckling.

"I'm going to kill you. Slowly and utmost most painfully Ezekiel."

As if they all had some inkling that my office was the place to be at the moment Amar, George, Uriah Will and Peter enter. Now this has taken some time to get used to. It's been two years since their initiation and as such because all of our significant others are friends, slowly we have all forcefully "bonded" together. Oh don't mistake that I like them. I still don't like Eric or Peter but I tolerate them as Tris, Christina and Shauna are friends with Lynn (well obviously Shauna and Lynn are sisters) and Cara. Both who are dating Eric and Peter respectively. Funny bromance moments have occurred between Zeke and Eric, sometimes I question my 'best friend' title but Zeke always manages to reassure me.

Well didn't that make me sound like a little girl.

Figuratively I snort and spit out my phlegm to reassert my masculinity. Outwardly, I slouch down more in my chair and shift my legs a part into a manly pose.

Apparently, Lynn discovered she liked both genders and somehow roped Eric into dating her. The Abnegation boy in me shakes his head in bewilderment at that but the Dauntless man shrugs and says hey whatever floats your boat. Solo? Yellow? No, YOLO as some of the Dauntless Dependants have taken to saying lately. Will beat the shit out of Peter when he walked in on him and Cara making out while coming back from the Fence rotation. That sure raised a few eyebrows. But we for some reason, have become to be referred to as "The Boys".

Sooner rather than later they are all laughing at my expense.

"Yeah, fucking hilarious you guys. Laugh it up while you can."

"Four, Four, Four" Amar starts shaking his head. "I have taught you many things, but this…This I have not taught you. This is all you bro."

I flip him off in response, sending them all into another round of laughter.

"Well there's no boys night for you then." Peter candidly remarks

"Thanks asshole"

"No problem"

"You can't get out of it the usual way man. You just can't. You didn't build the bridge and your now in the sea drowning." Will says philosophically.

"You're under the sea. You've sunken and died" Uriah corrects

"You have to take drastic measures Four." says Zeke "We know you haven't been there lately for Tris, but even this…this will be worse than your fear simulation…you might as well hand her the rest of your life with your heart on a platter literally speaking. It's time for drastic measures bro."

I look at each of them.

"Drastic measures?" I reply faintly.

Each replying with a solid nod.

Right drastic measures. I picture a scale, similar to the symbol of Candor. In my head I weigh Boys night on the left or 13 going on 30 on the right.

Boy's night or 13 going on 30.

Boy's night or 13 going on 30.

Just hope it doesn't bite me in the ass.

Be brave Tobias

* * *

As I make my way into mine and Tris' apartment, I chant the mantra of "Be brave" for I was going into a battlefield and there was a high chance that I wouldn't make it out alive tonight. Before I came home, I made sure that I came with some dinner for her to eat. Lessen the blow so to speak…more accurately the blow that might come to my head..or balls. I change my posture, drag but still march my feet a little and try to send off a dejected/thoughtful mood. I hear the shower turn off in the bathroom and breathe in deeply as Tris walks out. _Fuck Im going to hell for this. Please forgive me Tris, but I really don't want to go watch this audio-visual message whatever the hell it was called._

 _Be brave Tobias._

Receiving a big smile from Tris as she comes to me and hugs me. I enclose her in my arms and breathe her in for a few minutes. Tris doesn't carry a specific smell like some girls who bathe themselves in rose or any of the floral crap. No, Tris is all completely _Tris_ , and she smells like Home. This only adds to my guilt. I kiss her head and frame her face with my hands. Leaning my forehead against her own, I breathe in and slowly let it out.

Drastic measures Tobias.

"Babe…" Tris looks right up into my eyes with concern and Im entranced by their colour. _13 going on 30 Tobias,_ _Be brave._ "I know I promised to take you out tonight." Tris' face changes from concern to anger and I quickly hold up my hands in surrender "Something went wrong today and I got some bad news from Uriah just before I got home. Will and Peter were found fighting and Uriah has asked for my help to solve the problem. Some of the Dependants, not sure who yet, were caught in the clash."

"What! What were they fighting about? Are the kids okay?"

"Im not sure babe, Zeke is out trying to find Amar and George, but I heard during lunch that something happened between them so he's trying to find out whats going on with them –"

"Oh my gosh, where's Eric?"

"He left for an overnight meeting in Erudite earlier this afternoon. Babe, I'm sure everything will be alright, but I needed to come back here and let you –"

"Oh Four! That's okay! We can always go out another time." And the guilt keeps coming, but at the same time the relief! I answer her back quickly and concernedly "Are you sure Tris, I can ask one of the elder Leaders if they're still around to sort it out."

"No, no, no, you need to go and fix this."

I sigh in fake frustration while in disbelief that I _cannot_ believe that this was working. "Babe, I can find another –"

"Tobias. Go."

"Okay but I'll only go for a little while. Tris I feel really bad." Inwardly knowing that double meaning sure as hell was true. It goes worse when I see her smile a small smile.

"Go, Tobias."

"Okay, Im just gonna take a quick shower since I smell like crap." I reply to her and try so hard to stifle my reaction. _I am so going to hell for this. All to miss a stupid motion picture._

As I rush to head out the door, I pass Tris and pull her into a deep kiss smirking when I see that I have left her dazed. I speak to her in my low voice that I know leaves her weak kneed "I brought dinner and I'll make it up to you okay." I rush to the door quickly calling out "I'll call you if I take a long time, love you!"

Shaking off the guilty feeling as the door closes, I smirk – Boys night is on.

* * *

Ironically, none of the previously mentioned "boys" are in the Dauntless compound.

Hmm fancy that.

Instead they are all already at their previously arranged "look out". I head to the tracks, slowly running as I hear the 6:50pm train appear. Strangely the guilt has been replaced by freedom and outright reckless hilarity at the situation. Each of us have a set time, specific actions, and meeting locations before each separately heading to Hancock Building. We are Dauntless, but we were not stupid. We knew that there couldn't be any breaks in our story. It had to be solid.

As I push the button on the train door, I grab the side and pull myself up into the carriage. I lean against the door, letting the cold air push against me. This feels nice. I stare outside and idly watch the scenery pass by. My thoughts turn to Tris, a quarter and a half of me is feeling guilty. Immensely guilty. I try pass the time by coming up with a few apologies in my head, but none fit. So I make a promise to myself, that from now on, no matter what, I will be the best boyfriend for Tris and shower her with everything that I can possibly give and beyond. For I can't see a life without her in it. I know I will have to major grovelling if she finds out about tonight. Even if she doesn't, I will make it up to her. With that promise set, I see the Ferris wheel getting closer, and soon I prepare myself to jump.

I keep myself calm as I walk up the stairs to get to the top of the Hancock Building. The last ten steps are near, and I can already hear Uriah and Zeke laughing already. Excitement fills me and I quickly jog up the remaining steps forcing myself to forget how high up I currently am. I look at my watch comms device on my right wrist. 7:36pm, not bad. I push my way through the door and am abruptly assaulted by cheers and smacks on my arms and caught in a head lock.

"He's got his balls" I hear George yell. I smirk at them all, each holding a beer bottle and leaning on different places near the ledge. I admire the last few rays of the sunset before I am given a bottle of my own. Zeke gathers us all around in a circle.

"Well now that everyone is all here, let's get this party started!" We all chorus in our manly yells. "First off, I would like to congratulate Four here on getting out of chick flick night and meeting up with the men" Laughs resound the top of the building and I flip Zeke the bird "Raise thy bottle, for he has won the battle, but not the war...for Tris will sever his balls, Salute!" As one we all raise our bottle clicking while laughing or smiling in amusement. "Secondly, I come bearing gifts! While on my last visit to our dear peacemakers, I visited a friend who bestowed upon me, and only me, the fruits of their labour –"

"Oh Zeke you didn't need to go to Amity dear boy, I can bestow the fruits of my labour –"

"Oh fuck off you asshole!" Roars of laughter filled the air as Zeke went all flustered from Amar's comment. Even going as far to threaten Amar with a knife from his pocket, when Amar decide to shimmy up closer to Zeke. "Okay down boys" George says laughingly.

"As I was fucking saying before I was rudely interrupted, my friend gave me some Amity goodies – STOP TRYING TO MAKE IT INTO INNUENDOS SHITHEADS – they gave me some peace serum and this." Zeke said pulling out a rather large canister of the peace serum and judging by the dark colour of it, it is a large _undiluted_ canister of peace serum. In Amity they dilute the peace serum just enough to still feel "at peace" before putting it their bread. However, oe teaspoon of undiluted peace serum should make an average person with an average physique fly high as kite. Hmm looks like we're going to find out what happens with us. In his other hand sat in a large brown envelop of what looked like dried green leaves?

"Holy shit you did get goodies"

"Zeke how the hell did you get undiluted peace serum?"

"Stuff that, how the hell did you get marijuana? And in its original form?"

"Marijuana? What the hell is that? It just looks like leaves?"

"How the hell did you know it was marijuana Amar?"

"It used to be an illegal drug before the factions. From what I read when I was still in Erudite, Amity grows it in controlled amounts, ships it back to Erudite and they extract the oils needed for the peace serum as well as use it for some medical experiments."

"We my friends, and you can all thank me later, are going to have an awesome night!" He takes out small shot glasses, fill each glass for each of us. Rolls out eight long and thick parchment paper filling it with the green leaves before handing each man a roll, a lighter, and a glass.

"Time to be brave men."

The last time I look coherently at my wrist, my watch showed 7:57pm.

* * *

 **So hopefully this was alright. Please let me know your thoughts as it has been a while since Ive written something lol.**

 **Leave me a comment, I'll take flames/compliments/opening debates/etc. I want to make another chapter but Im not sure if this was good.  
**

 **I know its different but yeah thats what I was going for since Im not too familiar with the specifics.**

 **Cheers**

 **mumarhz**


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